Chicharrones...This Comes From Grocery Eats.com

If you’ve never had chicharrones then you my friend are missing out on the taste of magic. If you’re wondering just what the fuck I’m talking about, chicharron is pork rind aka cracklins aka pork skin. They are served in a number of ways, most often you can find them seasoned and deep fried.

You can usually cop these at any corner store. I like them but that’s is just some entry level shit into the world of chicharrones. If you really want to taste your dreams then you need to man the fuck up and get some Chicharron Tacos. Thing with them is that they don’t deep fry the skin for the tacos. It’s seasoned and and fried in a pan.

Hands down the best place in San Francisco to get chicharron is La Palma out on 24th and Florida. It’s a Mexicatessan. They sell their own lard, salsas (salsa casero is my favorite), cheeses, tortillas, carnitas by the pound, and a whole mess of shit. You can have your chicharron prepared in a variety of ways. My favorite though is the tacos de canasta. Canasta means basket. These are premade tacos that are put in a basket under layers of cloth to keep them warm. What makes these good is that since they are in the basket the warm tacos sweat in their own steam resulting in a soft and slightly greasy tortilla. Not oily, just greasy enough to give the tortilla a small taste of pork fat. The crispy chicharron becomes super tender and just taste fucking amazing.

Aside from the taco’s de canasta there are also just straight up tacos, these being Tacos Casero. As can be seen below these are much crispier chunks of pork skin. The small chunks of fat hanging on are just another layer in this awesome as fuck flavor profile.

Finally we get to the fucking beast. The chicharron burrito aka the tube of death.

excuse the budlight, I was at my boys house and that’s all he had.

This is not something standard. It’s not on the menu at La Palma but if you ask they will make. Dude didn’t even flinch when I asked for it so I knew I was about to get bodied. I ordered a regular because I didn’t want to fuck it all up with all the shit that comes with a super. That and the thought of jamming this thing full of crema and cheese was scary. La Palma uses real crema, not some bullshit sour cream from safeway. The first bite was just rice and beans so I thought to myself, fuck I coming through the back door on this shit.

This was the like my third bite and I thought shit this won’t be so bad, a good mix of chicharron and filler. A small amount of relief over came me as I realized this would actually be manageable. I was fucking wrong. I took another bite and the chicharron let me know that this shit was not a game.

This was fucking war. I fought through intense lays of seasoned fried pork skin. In the beginning the flavor just exploded in my mouth with each crack of crispy pork skin, but as I progressed I began to hear a little voice in my head screaming “NOOOOOO!!!” That voice was my stomach. I ignored that voice because this was war and I wanted to win. I fought long and hard but in the end I lost. I got to the heel and while I had destroyed all of the meat that last little bit of rice, beans and tortilla fucking taunted me. I couldn’t put it down. I could have if I didn’t put away 4 tacos prior to this battle but I wasn’t thinking. The burrito fucking murdered me.

As much as I would like to have a rematch I don’t think it’s wise. Yeah I was hungover but this shit is no joke. My stomach was working overtime on that shit. My advice to you is to just have the tacos. Unless you don’t like someone, then ask your taqueria to deep fry your chicharron burrito and ruin someone’s life with that.

in related news, after this and deep fried pancakes my wife is beginning to think that Grocery is a bad influence.